Saturday, February 21, 2015

A Typical Day in the Life of My Unborn Son

....at least how I imagine things are going in there:

3:20 AM - I've been sleeping for a while, but now seems like a good time to roll around. Mom already shifted from her right to left side about three times trying to get comfortable and she seems to have found a good spot. This means it's my turn to get comfy now.

3:23 AM - It seems I have disturbed Mom, because now she's up and moving around. I might have accidentally rolled on her bladder, again. I can't help it. It just keeps getting in my way!

4:45 AM - So I went back to sleep for a little bit but that got old pretty fast. I'm hungry I'm hungry I'm hungry I'm hungry I'm hungry MOM WAKE UP AND EAT SOMETHING.

5:00 AM - That breakfast was so satisfying that now I will do a victory lap with some Rockette kicks while Mom tries to get one last hour of sleep in before work.

7:15 AM - Sweet! Second breakfast.



9:45 AM - Mom has been working pretty hard for about two hours now, so it's a good time for me to remind her that I'm still in here. ATTENTION PLEASE. Time for some break dancing!

10:50 AM - One of my favorite times of the day. Mom is trying to teach her class, and I really want to give some instructions too. I can hear her talking loudly to the class, so I will give an extra push in here to help her out. Oops... that seems to have been counterproductive. Now she's breathing extra hard. I must have pushed on her lungs accidentally.

12:20 PM - Lunch time! I love this meal. Eating is the best. It always makes me want to dance around.

12:50 PM - Mom's folding herself up to get in the car again. I hate this. It's basically the worst. I try to tell her this every time by giving her a good kick in the ribs... but she never seems to get the point. Now she has to sit here and get her breath again. Of course. Come on, Mom. Just quit climbing into the car and we can move past this little routine.

2:00 PM - I can tell Mom is starting to get uncomfortable from being on her feet for so long. This is when she usually tries to sit down for a little bit and maybe put her feet up. I don't mean to make them so swollen, I swear...



3:45 PM - Time for more food! This is the best. Usually Mom tries to go for something healthy like an apple and cheese. Sometimes she will get ice cream, instead... it's no slushy, but that's pretty good too.



4:00 PM - It seems like I have worn Mom out. Time for a nap! For some reason when this happens I get this feeling of something pressing on me, sometimes. I usually kick back. I swear, someday I'm going to find out what's trying to climb all over me and I will get back at it. I bet it's a dog.

5:45 PM - Annnnnnnnnd we're awake and eating again. This is the best. I loooooooove food.

6:30 PM - Mom is finally chilling out and putting her feet up, so it's time for some kickboxing. One time Dad decided to rest his head on top of me around this time, so I kicked him in the face. He totally deserved it! I'm trying to get a workout in, okay?





8:00 PM - Things are starting to get warm, so that must mean Mom is getting another bubble bath. She seems to like those, I guess because I am so heavy that I make her back hurt. Oops. I am looking forward to seeing what a real bath is like someday, because right now no matter how much I move around, I don't really get to experience it. Bummer.

8:45 PM - It seems pretty early to me, but Mom has decided it's time for bed. She's laying on her left side right now, but I'm not psyched about this position. Gotta let her know.

8:50 PM - It took Mom a whole five minutes (GOSH) but finally she turned over to her right side. More comfortable now.



9:00 PM - Just kidding. I liked the left side better.

9:45 PM - MOM YOU ARE ON YOUR BACK, WHAT ARE YOU DOING? This is the worst. I have to let her know. Time to kick the old lungs again.

10:45 PM - Okay, it seems we have found a happy place for now... see ya in the morning, Mom!



See ya soon, Baby boy. : )
-K.

1 comment:

  1. LOL Oh my goodness! I love this post! So cute, and I seriously did laugh out loud! :)

    ReplyDelete