Monday, January 14, 2013

"If you can't say something nice..."

Oh hey!

I'm back after a very busy two days... and the rest of the week is going to keep right on going in that vein. I'm a little worried because when I looked at the portal for school today (since I had a day off) and checked the absentee list, it was seriously triple what it was any day last week. This flu stuff is serious business. I was already sick before/on Christmas, so I'm hoping I won't pick up whatever is going around now. Gonna be hitting the sanitizer hard tomorrow!

A. and I had a very busy day today, even though we were both off work. First thing this morning, we had cake for breakfast. Literally- we did our cake tasting this morning. It was AWESOME. If you are getting married, I highly recommend you pick a cake baker that offers a tasting for you. Some bakers I researched either charged for a tasting or didn't offer one at all. This cake baker is extremely personable and her cake was delicious, and she was also very affordable. I went into that meeting feeling a little stressed out about it and came out feeling awesome. Hooray for cake!

We also picked our menu with our reception hall this afternoon and the event coordinator walked us around since A. hadn't yet seen the place. (He "trusts my judgment" on everything : ) Luckily he really liked it, and the coordinator was good about walking us through everything. Now I have a whole new list of things we need to decide and people I need to call. Phew.

Also, we FINALLY went to AAA and started making official plans for our honeymoon!

Let me start off by saying this part of our planning process has NOT been a field of roses with butterflies and rainbows. First of all, since we decided to buy a house, our honeymoon budget was slashed pretty dramatically. Initially we REALLY wanted to go to Hawaii. (Mostly thanks to Modern Family and the appeal of not having to worry about passports, customs, etc.) Then we discovered how expensive it was to both a) stay there and b) travel there from the East Coast. (Also, it takes a really long time to get there from the East Coast.) So we decided we'd rather go somewhere in the Caribbean. A lot of our friends have gone there, we weren't really into the whole Mexico idea, it wouldn't take long to get there. So we went to AAA in November with the idea of our budget and dreams of clear water and white sand, and not a whole lot else.


I don't know if our agent was grumpy all the time or was just grumpy because she had to work the night before Thanksgiving (and in retrospect, that might not have been the best night to go), but it did NOT go well. Here are a few fantastic conversation snippets we have relived again and again since that fateful night:

Agent: "Where would you like to go?"
Me: "Well, we were thinking somewhere in the Caribbean."
Agent: "Well, that's not very specific. Haven't you gotten any ideas from looking through your bridal magazines?"
....Like it's my job to sit around and comb through magazines for honeymoon ideas? At the time I was wedding planning, house hunting, working two part time jobs, and trying to finish my last master's class. I thought the travel agent would help us with ideas within our budget... which leads me to this gem:

Agent: "What's your budget?"
Me & A: "(tell her our budget)"
Agent: "Well, that's not very much."
.....Well, would you like to pitch in some cash then?!

All in all, she was very judge-y and condescending, and as soon as we walked out the door we got in a huge fight that ended in me sitting silently in the passenger's seat with my arms crossed for much of the car ride home. It was not a pleasant evening.

Luckily, today's experience was much better. Our agent (a different one, obviously) was friendly, helpful, full of suggestions and information. And even though the budget comment from Agent #1 was not very nice, it did make us re-evaluate the realistic aspect of our budget, and after some discussion we decided that Disney World seemed like a good bet. After talking with our New Awesome Agent, we came up with a plan that was in our budget and still seems totally fun and exciting. We both love Disney and Pixar (my favorite movie is Tangled) and I know we will have a great time... hopefully I can get some groom mouse ears on A. (I know that is very unlikely, but a girl can dream!)

Here's the thing. I was so excited that I posted the same Instagram picture above onto Facebook, and some people have been liking it and commenting with fun tidbits. But someone- someone I don't even know very well- commented and said, "Are you seriously going to Disneyworld?" I know the internet leads to tone-of-voice being interpreted in different ways, but that comment really cut me deep, even though I'm trying make it go away. Yes, we are seriously going to Disney World for our honeymoon. And it is going to be EPIC. I realize it's not everyone's dream destination, and certainly not a dream destination for a honeymoon for a lot of people. But for some of us, it is. A. and I have talked about this a lot, and we decided we'd rather spend the money on a nice house that we would have for years, rather than blow it on a week-long extravagant trip. And it's fine that other people choose to do the latter. I think when it comes to your wedding, and your honeymoon, you should do whatever makes you happy that is within your means, and I will be happy for you because you are in love and happy and that's what matters. But I wish people wouldn't cut down our decision without knowing any of the careful thought or consideration (and also the big fight) that led up to it. If they have a problem with it, I would gladly accept any money they'd fork over to upgrade our vacation.

Until then, in the words of a famous Disney character- Thumper from Bambi - "If you can't say something nice, say nothing at all."

Please do me a favor, loyal reader who read through this whole blog post, and keep that in mind when you're interacting with people this week. : )


  1. I wanted to go to Disney World for my honeymoon, too. Unfortunately, Scott and I still haven't had our honeymoon, but I think it's a GREAT destination! :)

    1. Thanks Becky!!! We do, too - we have been drooling over the restaurant guide for the last 24 hours, trying to decide where to make reservations as soon as they open up for us at midnight. Yum! And we still don't have to mess around with passports, which is a bonus in my book.